Ancient

How long has this disaster lived? How long has this distant feeling lived among the societies abnormals? How long have I felt so distant? How long has anxiety existed in this ancient heart of mine? Oh how ancient is this depression of mine?

Am I ancient or am I missing like the stars that died?

We are not abnormal, abnormal is what they call us but we are more normal than the oxygen that they breathe. I feel distant but I am close, I hug myself and feel the love. Anxiety oh anxiety I never thought you’d be the one to cease my heart. Oh depression oh depression how long have you been waiting dormant in my soul? 

Am I ancient or am I missing like the stars that died?

I once battled seven armies and destroyed them all, I never killed a single one but oh I destroyed them. I destroyed the seven thoughts and didn’t dare to kill them for I feared I’d kill myself.

Am I ancient or am I missing like the stars that died?

I am thought one: nobody would care if you just disappeared.

I am thought two: I only ever fail.

I am thought three: I am alone.

I am thought four: I hate them all.

I am thought five: hide and run away.

I am thought six: leave me alone.

I am the final thought I am thought seven: what did I ever do wrong?

I destroyed thought one by disproving the thought, I showed that army how people care, how people would miss me. Just ask them and you may get a lie, but maybe you won’t. Don’t talk to them for a while, if they don’t talk to you first, you know where you stand. I destroyed thought two by proving I could do something and not fail. I got a 100 on my computer test. I proved that army wrong. I destroyed thought three by showing them I’m not alone, I have a brother and a father and a mother. And they all love me with all they have. I am not alone. I destroyed thought four by showing the army that I don’t hate them all, I hate some, but I don’t hate my family. I destroyed thought five by trying to hide, I ran outside and hid for a while. I came back in and they missed me so. I destroyed thought six by telling them to leave me alone, by barricading my door, she told me I could’ve just said so and they would give me space. I soon found out I don’t want to be alone. I destroyed thought seven by… It’s not that you did anything wrong, it’s that you did everything right and Satan wants to destroy you because you’re such a threat to him and his army. I’m part of the army of God and I will not be destroyed and I have the power to destroy those thoughts.

Am I ancient or am I missing like the stars that died?

Depression oh depression I command thee to leave me alone. Oh anxiety oh anxiety I command you to hide and flee. Leave me be.

Am I ancient or am I missing like the stars that died?

-thanks for reading that was the prompt for the day.

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