#Monday (Catastrophic)

Today is Monday; Hi, I am deeply sorry for not posting in a long period of time, the reason is because, A: I had a concussion for two whole weeks. B: I have been depressed and C: I have been reluctant.

Today was an awful day, I had encounters with two ex-friends and it hurt, and it hurts even more because my other friends are taking their side. I don’t know what to do, I honestly don’t know what to do.

My mom said that I need to stop writing depressing poems, same with my brother and two friends. I guess I should, it’s only making me even more sad. I’ve been reducing the time I spend to make myself happy more and more all the time, because I’m trying to make everyone else happy, which I know isn’t possible. But I do it anyway.

I used to go on Tokyo Otaku Mode and just scroll through it all and add things to my wishlist because I think it’s cool. I haven’t done that, nor have I gone and spent time with my animals or listening to my music. I guess it’s because I’ve become really depressed. I also used to play computer games but I feel like if I play them what I’m doing is wasting time I could be using to do something that’s actually useful in life, like working on art to sell. I’ve been working on art to sell for the past month or so since I have to raise $2000 for my trip for my bootcamp I am going to go to.

I would play this one mmorpg that I used to play all the time, the only problem is, is that I used to play that with a certain friend who I am no longer friends with and thus it makes me sad… So I need to find some other games that I can play that won’t make me sad. If any of you have a suggestion that would be awesome, or if you have some sort of idea for something I can do, just to spend time for myself (keeping in mind I don’t have my license or money.). Thanks~!

I find that when I read books I get so emotionally involved in them that I become the character and take on their emotions so I haven’t been reading as much either lately because it tends to make me depressed or emotional.

Thanks, have a good day, I’ll try and post more often again, I’ll post tomorrow during my spare like I used to.


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